The Devil Made Us Equal
by Michael D. Robbins
Wednesday, August 10, 2016
The Devil told the people, “I’m a Democrat. Elect me and everyone will be equal. I will punish the wealthy, and the businesses and corporations. I will tax them without mercy. We’ll have Socialism to make things more equal. We’ll redistribute income, savings, and property, but we’ll call it ‘wealth’. And we’ll call ourselves ‘Progressives’. We’ll do away with economic classes and differences. ‘From each according to his ability, to each according to his needs.’ We’ll have total equality! Even the most poor, hungry, and downtrodden will be equal to billionaire Bill Gates!”
So the voters elected the Devil, and before long, they were all poor, hungry, shackled and chained, and equal to Bill Gates, who was also poor, hungry, shackled and chained. The flames of Hell nipped at their feet and ankles, and there were signs in English saying “WORK SETS YOU FREE”, in Spanish saying “EL TRABAJO TE LIBERA”, in German saying “ARBEIT MACHT FREI”, and in many other languages.
The people cried out to the Devil, “How can you do this to us? This is not what we wanted!”
The Devil replied, “This is exactly what I promised you, equality! And out of jealousy, laziness, and a desire to get something for nothing, you elected me. I kept my promise. Now you are all Progressives, with equality. And you’ll work for me until the day you die, when I’ll get your soul. Now get back to work before the flames overcome you!”
Copyright © 2016 by Michael D. Robbins